Finances #1 - Tithing And Giving As A Widow

Did this strike a chord with anyone? 

Tithing may be a sore subject with some people.  Others may embrace this philosophy wholeheartedly.  Either way, I want to write about what I believe ... and I believe this is an important part of your financial planning.

I have seen first-hand how important this piece of my financial puzzle has become.  It may not seem logical if you are in dire money straits to be giving away what you feel that you need to survive.  Why would God ask us to give to others when we are worrying daily how we will survive and take care of our family?  We are worrying about paying our bills, and the pastor just preached another sermon on the importance of giving.  No joke ... mine did, just last week.  That's what got me started on this post.  And trust me on  this ... it makes "cents."  Pun intended.  :)

Whether you use your Bible to justify it, or you simply feel like "you get back what you give" ... it is important that you are giving, even when you feel as if your budget is telling you that you can't afford to give.  I am not saying that you should just hand over all your money to a church or organization.  I am saying that you sit down, and determine what you are able to give - what you truly feel "led" to share - and then set that plan in motion.

Here's why I feel strongly about this:

1. There are always people who are worse off than you.  If you have a home, sigh in relief and be grateful.  If you can put food on the table, smile and rejoice.  If you are wearing shoes right now, wiggle those toes and be happy.  God has provided your needs.  There are many who don't have the things with which you have been blessed.  This is not to make you feel guilty, it's to get you to realize that we often focus on our own wants (notice I didn't say needs) and we end up feeling sorry for ourselves.  Pity party in progress!
2. God has provided everything we have.  We may think that we have worked oh so hard, and have met our own needs ... but just who gave you the skills you use to earn your paycheck?  Who gave you the breaks or opened the doors for you to prosper?  As Christians, we know that we are dependent upon God for our protection, our survival and our prosperity. 

Malachi 3:10 says, " Bring the whole tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. Test me in this,” says the Lord Almighty, “and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it."

2 Corinthians 9:7 says,"[So let] each one [give] as he purposes in his heart, not grudgingly or of necessity; for God loves a cheerful giver."

 Luke 6:38 says "give and it will be given to you, a good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over it will pour into your lap, for by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you in return."
 
There are folks that say you must give 10%, others that say you must be "Spirit-led" and give what the Holy Spirit tells you to give.  I believe there is a difference between tithing and giving.  Tithing is a spiritual discipline where you set aside 10% of your income to give to God's work - essentially giving it back to God.  Giving, for me, falls under the heading of "Spirit-led" and is over and above the monthly tithing.  It's for those times of extra abundance, and when there is a special need presented that I can fill.

However you choose to define it, and whether you choose tithing or giving or both ... the important idea is to share with others what you have been given, and to give back to God some of what He has blessed you with.

You might wonder how you could ever give away what you need yourself.  I can tell you from personal experience that God does indeed "fill in the gaps."  Just like the story from 2 Kings 4:1-7:

1 One day the widow of one of Elisha's fellow prophets came to Elisha and cried out to him, "My husband who served you is dead, and you know how he feared the LORD. But now a creditor has come, threatening to take my two sons as slaves." 2 "What can I do to help you?" Elisha asked. "Tell me, what do you have in the house?""Nothing at all, except a flask of olive oil," she replied. 3 And Elisha said, "Borrow as many empty jars as you can from your friends and neighbors. 4 Then go into your house with your sons and shut the door behind you. Pour olive oil from your flask into the jars, setting the jars aside as they are filled." 5 So she did as she was told. Her sons brought many jars to her, and she filled one after another. 6 Soon every container was full to the brim!"Bring me another jar," she said to one of her sons."There aren't any more!" he told her. And then the olive oil stopped flowing. 7 When she told the man of God what had happened, he said to her, "Now sell the olive oil and pay your debts, and there will be enough money left over to support you and your sons."

As a widow, I need to live in expectation that God will act on my behalf - according to my faith.  God will supply my needs, according to my trust in Him.  My trust in His goodness and acts of faith, such as tithing/giving, will bring more abundance into my life.

Whether you are in a season of plenty or a season of want...the expectation is that you trust God. That you start with what you have, be willing to do whatever it takes, act believing God will show up and honor God with the results.

Financial Tips from a Widow's Point of View

I am getting inspired to write a few upcoming posts about financial matters.  Specifically, things that I have learned or that have helped me in getting through the minefield of juggling finances as a single woman again; having to adjust to not only a single income but added pressure in the form of medical bills, credit card debt, etc.

I hope that these tips will be helpful.  One of my goals in writing this blog is to share what I have learned, in hopes of helping someone else.  Or maybe starting a dialogue and learning something new myself!  :)

So stay tuned.

Saying Goodbye with Hospice

We learned a few things about saying goodbye during our short experience with hospice.  The main thing I learned was that no matter how much time you have, it's never as long as you think.  You never believe how quickly the time slips away, even though you have been told how rapidly it will be gone.

Take that time to connect with your loved one where they are emotionally.  If they want to talk about memories, then talk about that.  If they want to have a heart to heart chat about their mortality, don't shy away from that topic.  Be honest and direct.  Tell them what is in your heart, and how they have impacted your life.  Tell them they won't be forgotten, and they mattered to you.  Most of all, let them guide the conversation.  Respond to what they have to share with you.

Robby and I never really got to have these talks.  Because of the tumor he really couldn't talk much from the time it was diagnosed, and it only got worse.  The hardest part was not hearing him say "I love you."  He was one of those guys that would tell me he loved me half a dozen times per day.  He would call to check in with me during the day, and he (we) never hung up the phone or walked out the door without saying we loved each other.  Not hearing that for such a long time, and at some point realizing I would never hear his voice again, was heartbreaking.

As their life draws to a close, people tend to withdraw.  They "close in" and sports, politics or what's on TV in the next room doesn't matter.  All that matters is the immediate, the physical.  I'm hot. I'm cold. I love you.  Do you love me?  Be present with them, and listen.  Be quiet and respond.  Hold their hand and let them know you are there.  That is the best gift you can give them as they die.  To be a witness to their life and their death.  And to make sure they are not forgotten.

Memories Are Made Of This

This song reminds me so much for Robby today - it was one of his favorite songs!  I got out the Dean Martin CD this morning as I was baking cookies to listen to it; Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin are my usual choices in the stereo when I bake.  :)

Fall Back Into Blogging Day 4 - Fave Fall Recipe

OK, this isn't one of my favorite recipes ... YET.  Only because I haven't made it yet.  But I am sure that it will soon become a fall staple around our house. 

Because you see ... we love cheesecake.  Yes, my daughters and I are in love with cheesecake.  I know it's certainly not the healthiest of treats, but there's just something about it that calls to us ... begs us to indulge.  So we do.  With great pleasure.

PUMPKIN CHEESECAKE

http://pinterest.com/jmerrell81/recipes-to-try/ - that's the link to my Pinterest board with all the recipes that I have been meaning to try.  You will find the recipe there.  Here's a picture too, BTW:

 

Doesn't that look yummy!

So what is YOUR favorite fall recipe or treat?

Leave a comment and/or link below.

Sharing is good.  :)



Wednesday's "Fall Back Into Blogging" - Sweaters = Fall

One of the things that I look forward to most about fall is the chance to get my sweaters off the shelf in my closet and back into my apparel rotation.  I love the cozy feel of sweaters, and have since I was in elementary school.  There is something about their softness and warmth that reminds me of cool, crisp school mornings while waiting for the bus. 

School shopping for me coincided with my early August birthday, and my grandmother always insisted on taking me to lunch at the Tea Room in Meier & Frank (back before it was May Co.) - to her back then, it was the height of sophistication.  There I would invariably order a French Dip sandwich, and she would let me order a hot fudge sundae as a special birthday treat.  Then we would commence to shop for cute sweater sets, cable-knit knee socks and sturdy brown "school shoes."

I like scarfs now, too.  Never really thought much about them when I was younger, because they were always the heavy, cabled ones that your grandmother knitted (that would be my OTHER grandmother, because the one who took me school shopping didn't knit or sew or crochet), but as I get older a lightweight, pretty scarf appeals to me more and more each year.  So now it's time to bring out my sweaters and scarves in all their glorious colors and textures!  Yum!

Tuesday's "Fall Back Into Blogging" - What fall looks like around here

This a BEAUTIFUL photo of fall at Silver Falls State Park - about 5 miles from my house.  I cannot and will not take credit for this gorgeous photo - it is the work of Don Briggs, and here is his Photostream on Flickr; it is not to be missed!